The Small Fry's parents gave me the snug ride carrier I've been eyeing as a parting gift. I like it, it it's modish blue and brown gender neutrality. I took it out of the box and showed it to Alex and then went to bed. This morning, when I came downstairs, I found it still on the floor.

And I sat down on the couch and cried.

This is what scares me about unemployment- it's not the adoption that's taking a long time. I'm OK with that. It's staring discouragement in the face, wondering what I am supposed to do with it, now that I have nothing and no one to help me avoid it.

The easy answer is that I have to overcome it.

The hard part is actually doing it. That's a bummer, but in a good way. On the other side, it will all have been worth it.